sttngfashion:

Friend of the blog slash Greatest Person, Stephanie, sent me this zine from 1990 for my birthday, which is today. This thing is an incredible gold mine of a 7th-grade boy’s thoughts on TNG’s alien races. Sample excerpt: “If I was getting married in a betazoid wedding I would be really worried because everyone would be looking at me, but there would be lots of naked women there, and I might get an erection.”

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE

Ingredients:

• 1/4 tsp black pepper
• 1 tsp Crushed red pepper
• 3 1/8 Heinz reduced sugar ketchup (approx. 2 14 oz bottles)
• 1 1/2 Tbsp. spicy mustard
• 2 Tbsp. Lee and Perrin’s Worchestshire sauce (Thick variety)
• 1 1/3 Tbsp. Splenda (r)

Yields 1 1/2 empty 14 oz. Heinz ketchup bottles (be sure to rinse thoroughly)

Directions:

In a double boiler, add water to the bottom pot then in the top pot combine all the ingredients and stir with a wire whisk over high heat.  It’ll take a while for the water underneath to boil.  Once the water has begun boiling, the sauce will begin to bubble.  When this occurs, reduce heat.  Stir the sauce occasionally until sauce thickens and turns a browner color taking care not to allow the sauce to scorch on the sides of the pot.  Sample sauce.  If a spicier flavor is desired, then add more crushed red pepper.  If it tastes too “ketchupy” then add a touch of mustard and/or some Worchestshire sauce.  (Warning:  a little mustard goes a long way in this recipe).  Once desired flavor, color and texture are achieved turn off heat, then remove top pot from bottle pot (containing boiling water) to cool. 

Once the sauce cools to about room temperature, transfer sauce with a funnel to rinsed ketchup bottles then chill for a few hours in the refrigerator prior to serving.